A brief commentary to Christian woman who desire a husband

This is a very simplified post on the two problems that women must confront in themselves if they desire a husband.

There’s two main points that most Christians miss:

1. If a woman is having trouble being asked out then she needs to work on her physical attractiveness OR if she has a lot of men hanging around her but not asking her out then she is aiming too high.

Men are attracted to beauty. Exercise, nutrition, touch of make up, flattering feminine clothing, and all of these things to improve her physical attractiveness will help.

If she has men hanging around her then she is already physically attractive, but it is likely that she is not attracted to those that are around her. She will have to recalibrate her attraction sensors to the men around her instead. As an observer says, eliminating any hint of the entitlement, self delusion and princess mentality is key.

2. If a woman is having trouble staying in a relationship that is directed towards marriage then she needs to work on how to become more of a godly woman.

That would be a woman who is respectful, submissive, encouraging, and willing to go above and beyond for her man. If she is easily prone to criticism, gossip, and all other manner of unrighteous behavior then this will not help her case to get a man to ask her out.

These are two different responses to two different problems that women must be aware of. You need both to get into a relationship to where a man is going to want to commit to you.

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5 Responses to A brief commentary to Christian woman who desire a husband

  1. I think there are a lot of women (well, in my congregation definitely) with relatively spineless fathers. As such, they don’t feel secure. Being insecure, they’re “locked up,” unable to submit. It’s like social proof, but for their own psyche—she doesn’t have a strong man around, so she can’t get a strong man around.

    This also applies to physical attractiveness to some extent. Men are agents of change; a fat girl has no greater potential ally than her father.

    All these are generalities, but, you know.

  2. Well, there is some “truth” to the phrase “you are who you attract.”

    If you are constantly of the world you will attract worldly friends, worldly advice, worldly posesssions, and a worldly mindset.

    The amazing part about Christianity, though, is that we can overcome that. But yes, generalities…

  3. an observer says:

    A woman not getting asked out is probably aiming too high, and ignoring the good, beta men she doesnt find attractive, because her standards are unrealistically high. They don’t exist in her mind, hence their signals of interest as dismissed as creepy, intrusive or invalid.

    A woman can work on her physical looks, yes, but this is of little help if her attitude is one of entitlement, selfdelusion and princess mentality. Her looks might generate approaches, but if she desires marriage to a christian man, looks are not enoigh on their own.

    A woman that has trouble staying in relship may be wrongly applying the dating process. She may be dating out of her league, and/or not showing gratitude, respect and deference. Perhaps she is confusing the playas on the carousel for actual relationship seekers.

    Too many have been socialised into believing men want women too have a little moxie, which they act out as disrespect, irrational outbursts, selfishness and entitlement.

    I’ve never felt comfortable applying game techniques. Its necessity always seemed like a poor way to deal with female rebellion. Perhaps some of the issues here highlight why that may be so.

  4. @ An observer

    Good points. I’ll edit those in.

  5. Pingback: Things women can do to signal interest | Reflections on Christianity and the manosphere

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