Images from Further Ruminations on Game by Donal Graeme
So there’s a lot that has been going on in the Christian manosphere over the past couple of days at Free Northerner’s, Donal Graeme’s, SeriouslyPleaseDropit’s, Cane Caldo’s and Zippy’s blogs about game.
There is definitely progress being made, but the progress is incomplete.
As I discussed in Christian masculinity and confidence, the foundation of confidence comes from a fruitful walk with God as an outcropping of inner peace, faith, and boldness expression that comes from Eph 2:8-10.
Sophroneo is a good estimate of the counterpart between confidence, but because a soundness of mind in the Scriptures is related to self control and faith it is blended with them as the fruits of the Spirit. Neither is a toolkit needed. The approximation of godly masculinity directly to adoration and idolatry of self (dark triad traits) directly to temptation are straight forward aside from actions.
The blindness of men is often not in the actions that we take, but it is in either the hardness of heart or deception of the heart because out of the heart flow our actions.
In particular, the foundations of godly masculinity are found straight from the Bible.
2 Peter 1 (NASB)
3 seeing that His divine power has granted to us everything pertaining to life and godliness, through the true knowledge of Him who called us [d]by His own glory and [e]excellence. 4 [f]For by these He has granted to us His precious and magnificent promises, so that by them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world by lust. 5 Now for this very reason also, applying all diligence, in your faith supply moral [g]excellence, and in your moral excellence, knowledge, 6 and in your knowledge, self-control, and in your self-control, perseverance, and in your perseverance, godliness, 7 and in your godliness, brotherly kindness, and in your brotherly kindness, love. 8 For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they render you neither useless nor unfruitful in the true knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. 9 For he who lacks these qualities is blind or short-sighted, having forgotten his purification from his former sins. 10 Therefore, brethren, be all the more diligent to make certain about His calling and choosing you; for as long as you practice these things, you will never stumble; 11 for in this way the entrance into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ will be abundantly supplied to you.
Therefore, we know how we are to grow as Christians walking in godly masculinity.
Faith -> Moral excellence -> Knowledge -> Self Control -> Perseverence -> Godliness -> Brotherly Kindness -> Love
The Greek words are particularly illuminating:
- Faith – Pistis – Persuasion, moral conviction, reliance on God
- Virtue / Moral excellence – arete – From G730 (of male), properly manliness, valor, excellence, praise, virtue
- Knowledge – gnosis – knowledge / science
- Self control – egkrateia – temperance
- Patience – hupomone – endurance, long suffering
- Godliness – eusebeia – godliness, piety, holiness
- Brotherly kindness – Philadelphia – brotherly love/affection
- Love / Charity – agape – unconditional love
There are a couple important points to note here.
First, each of these qualities build on each other. Out of faith comes moral excellence to progress in God-likeness. And by now knowing what is good (and the one that is good is God) we gain the knowledge of the difference between the flesh and the Spirit. From that we exercise self control which is our free will to choose the Spirit or the flesh, and battling with the flesh over a long period of time we have endurance and patience in the faith. This is what godly masculinity is. Out of faith comes the knowledge and ability to be Christ-like and the application of Christ-likeness.
Second, it is only after godliness of self builds truly into brotherly love and charity. The fruit of serving others in the church is useless, if not built from a foundation of character within a man that is striving to be godly.
Third, how many Christian “nice guys” are actually progressing in their walks with God? I hate to sound defeatist but most Christians in today’s churches are there because it’s more of a social club or they think it is the right thing to do. Christians are to be continually growing and changing not just serving. If there is no change, then there is no growth.
Therefore, a pyramid would look like this:
Note: I like the recodified Donal’s LAMPS to PSALM.
Obviously, it can be broken down further into components of the fruits (of the Spirit or flesh) that are attractive to women when you are doing them. However, I am not going to do that at this present juncture.
edit: revision after discussing with Donal