One of the things I mentioned in yesterday’s post on Why I don’t respect women is the notion that is prevalent in men who find the manosphere:
I just want a woman to love me for who I am.
Often these men aren’t Christians, but there are some who are. But it provides an insight into the stark truth into the feminization of men. The Scriptures have it correct:
- Men are to love, not become embittered to, and honor women as co-heirs.
- Women are to respect and submit to men.
Men are not to respect women nor submit to them except in the specific instances I noted in the post from yesterday, and the same with women to men. Understanding the notion of which sex should love versus respect tells you of the mindset of the person. They are either brainwashed by feminism and disney fairytales or they know God’s truth.
Additionally, Christian men have it better than secular men. We know a God who pours out His love for us. He loves us so much that He sent His son into the world to die for us while we were still sinners (John 3:16, Romans 5). We know we are loved. We aren’t exposed to the harsh reality that agnostics and atheists are exposed to: that no one will ever “love” them for who they are except potentially their parents. Even that seems not to be the case with the rampant selfishness in today’s modern women.
As a man understanding that you don’t need a woman to love you in any sense of the word is freedom from the prison of your own mind. It is the expectation of love from women that drives most men to bitterness and resentment. It is the expectation of love from women instead of respect which will drive her away from you. Such a man will incorrectly desire love from the woman while respecting the woman. This puts enormous strain on the relationship as it is the inverse of what it was meant to be.
Conversely, when you realize that you don’t need love from a woman but rather respect allows you to see that her feelings do not drive your decisions. Rather it is you running the show, and she is along for the ride. It is not about her happiness but rather making decisions for the family falls into its proper frame of bringing you both toward Christ and living in the world but not of the world. It frees you to stand firm when she’s emotional or you need to chastise, correct, or teach.
When a woman is coming at you with full fury of her emotions in an argument will you be the one that expects respect or expects love? Would someone that expects respect willingly engage themslves in the argument and lose self control in it? Or, in other words, would you respect a leader that got constantly embroiled in petty arguments and emotions? Surely not.
Men need to first set themselves into the correct frame of reference as it will do wonders in order for them to understand how to interact with women and other people. This is why I constantly reinforce aligning with a correct Scriptural perspective in order that we interact correctly with others in love and in truth. Men will become men if they can understand and implement the Scriptures in its fullness.