My apologies

As with the “controversy” in the past two posts I would like to extend my apologies for all those involved. Whether my arguments — right or wrong — doesn’t matter if I acted outside the Spirit. I need to practice what I preach that there is almost never one sided fault in any controversial issue. Therefore, I take responsibility for my actions.

I acted impatient and unkind in my response. Instead of sticking to the facts I let my emotions get out of hand and looked for an argument instead. Hence, I apologize to both ChildofRa and the author over at unmasking feminism for my impatient and unkind behavior.

Regarding all of my posts: I still affirm that if you want specific topics addressed you should post on my contact page or in the comments section there. I have never failed to respond by e-mail or posting about it male or female. Please, keep on topic. If you can’t keep on topic I will remove you. This goes for people claiming others are trolls as well.

Thanks.

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21 Responses to My apologies

  1. Pingback: My apologies | Manosphere.com

  2. Pingback: Barking up the wrong tree | Christianity and the manosphere

  3. fuzziewuzziebear says:

    I am not certain if apologies are in order. However, I know that I did let my passion get the bete of me. There is a lot to be learned from this. For me, it is still under review.

  4. Maea says:

    I can understand why the responses went in the direction they did…and I can understand the views from all parties.

    What I find deeply concerning (and depressing) is the lack of acknowledging the shared responsibilities with these issues. Men and women understand things, respond, and communicate differently. These differences do not preclude mutual accountability and charity.

    I’d say most manosphere participants are passionate about their perspectives, but it’s a good idea to be charitable, too.

  5. KingProphetPriest says:

    I’ll stand by my words and the spirit in which they were said.

    It does, however, bring up the question of women wandering into men’s spaces and then finding the communication style not to their liking. Maea calls it out above – a difference in communication styles and understanding. If it’s not this particular female who-does-not-understand-the-space commenter today, it will be another one tomorrow and the week after and the week after. As an earlier poster said, Cane Caldo’s “no women allowed” policy has a certain appeal. Fewer flameouts.

    Only Deep Strength can decide if his response was motivated by things that need apologies and I commend him for recognizing it and making it public. He is absolutely right that our public failures need public confession.

  6. KingProphetPriest says:

    But then if you ban women entirely, you miss good stuff like the comment by hearthie in the previous thread.

    Ah, well.

  7. jack says:

    What is needed is a female intervention tool. When a girl gets off track, like child of ra did, and is engaging in standard-equipment female diversionary dialog, we hand her off to one of the right-thinking women to neutralize the issue before the men administer the hammer of masculine correction.

    We need strong, dominant women who can keep the other women from getting out of place. This is why I believe that women need to be leaders, and in fact I believe women can actually even be scriptural teachers.

    However, the boundary is discipleship. Women cannot disciple men (except moms with little children).

    Women can disciple other women. Men disciple men. Men can disciple their wives and daughters. Pastors have the ability and authority to disciple women outside their immediate authority.

    As far as the teaching of scriptural truths, I have no issue with learning about this from a woman.

    Back to topic, I think that ultimately the Christo-manosphere will come to be inhabited by more and more women, because they will ultimately be the more effective agents for the change in female behavior.

  8. @ KingProphetPriest

    Re: “no women allowed” policy

    I do not believe this needs to be implemented at the current juncture. However, if the comments are too inhabited by women I will strongly consider it.

  9. jack says:

    Left this at Unmasking:

    Here is the problem.

    For years now, men have been forced to listen to an endless list of female grievances, many of which are quite petty. Finally, when men are starting to get a little equal time, women continuously try to divert the discussion back to their own perspective.

    This essentially says that despite the great harm and disadvantage men – especially Christian men – have experienced, we are simply not allowed to discuss our lives without the women STILL attempting to litigate every potential distractor and exception.

    I am forced to conclude that women do not, and perhaps cannot care much for the suffering men experience, unless and until it creates a negative effect for them. (“Who harmed my mule?!?!?!”)

    If the female mind was engaged to develop the legal system, then when a person was brought into court for stealing something, they would immediately say “well, what about all those other people who stole things??

    Deflection. Diversion. It never stops.

  10. My perspective which I also posted over there:

    In regard to “manosphere narratives,” some are true and some aren’t. I always try to factually check out if they are true, hence the actual “how many Christian virgins” are there left.

    We can recognize that some are true and some are false. Not all women will branch swing. Sure, they have the capability to dump their current man and move to a supposedly better one. However, some women are indeed more commitment minded than others. Not all women have been brainwashed into “competing” with men, but it’s still very hard to find ones that want to “complement” men rather than have some sort of egalitarian relationship.

    On the other hand, some common narratives are true. Daughters of the King or Evangelical American Princess syndrome are unequivocally true. 80/20 rule is generally true. There is definitely a dearth of Christian virgins (and Christian men) in the Church.

    Now, in regard to Heather G or ChildofRa if I’m debating the validity of points I skip the parts of where we agree especially if they are godly things which we believe should apply. This is simply how I do debate style points if there is contention or disagreement. I only hone in on the parts where we disagree to see if there is common ground or complete disagreement. This is not narrative or not being able to exhibit kindness or patience with someone.

    It’s more akin to how men compartmentalize a debate rather than view the sweeping whole picture which women do at the same time. Accusing me of a “lack of good will” or “unwilling to answer honest questions” or “deflecting the topic” especially from the women is false and disingenuous. This accusation is hypocritical because it does the same thing that they are accusing me of doing.

    —————————

    Obviously, I’m not going to back down from my arguments because they are right. I said to post any other discussion topics to the about page. If people cannot follow the rules that I stated they will be shut down. I have had this policy for over a year, and I’m not going to change it because women are telling me I don’t have good will, or unwilling to answer questions, or deflect the topic. It’s simply more shaming language.

    My apology is for the attitude I used in posting. My word choice and directness was not patient or kind. However, my arguments are still valid and stand.

  11. Looking Glass says:

    @DS:

    You can have patience, but you can’t teach those who can’t learn. Child of Ra’s problem is she’s unteachable. She seems to really want information, but she lacks the one quality within herself to actually learn. It’s what separates the ladies that do hang around these parts (and contribute well) with the others.

    The Heather G-types are actually the harder issue. They’re Christians, but their own self-righteousness crops up all over the place, making productive conversations suddenly die.

  12. @ Looking Glass

    That may be the case. We shall see!

  13. ChildofRa says:

    To Deep Strength,

    I apologize for my behavior, if I seemed to distract from the topic at hand it was not my intention. Also for I am sorry to the other commenters as well, it normally takes a lot to steam my kettle and I don’t let comments bother me but those comments did (i even found myself crying ugh) anywhoo, I just wanted to state that I am truly sorry and seriously I am hear to learn christianity from a males perspective vecause majority of blogs or articles I have read are mostly from a female’s view. So again I am sorry

    -childofRa

  14. Jacob says:

    ChildofRa, if you want to be taken seriously by Christian men, you could start by changing the pagan orientation of your gravatar and its image to one that isn’t softly pornographic.

  15. Heather G says:

    If you’re going to be talking ABOUT women, then it would seem particularly unfair and self-serving to silence any women who don’t agree with you. This would particularly be the case if you are actually refering to THEIR blog on your site – if you quote from them or reference things they have written, but don’t want to allow them to defend themselves or present their point of view.

  16. @ Heather G

    False.

    1. People are allowed to defend and discuss themselves and their point of view… IF they stay on topic.

    2. People are not allowed to start talking about totally different topics when the posts are about certain topic.

    In this particular case, we were discussing issues of personal responsibility and different scenarios that may happen to a woman in marriage who is cheated on. The particular poster started derailing the conversation toward men who are frigid in marriage.

    If she wants to discuss men who are frigid in marriage then e-mail me or post a comment to start another post and I’ll put up a topic on it. I’ve always written about a particular topic if someone e-mails me to wants me to create a different post to discuss it. However, she didn’t and continued, so I shut her down.

    I provided a clear outlet for discussing different topics, but she didn’t take it and complained and painted herself as a victim. Apparently other women such as yourself side with her too.

    How hard is it to follow the rules of the blog?

  17. ChildofRa says:

    My blog is title tree of angels and demons and the picture is of a female with one side being an angel and the other a devil – which is perfect for my blog. Second I like egyptian mythology and have been fascinated with egypt as a child so that way I chose the name.

  18. ChildofRa says:

    Also what does a name have to do with being taken seriously by christian men or a picture?

    If i had a picture of pucca or sebastian michealis would you take me serious ir if my username was khalessi would you take me serious or do i need to have a holy name or have a picture of a cross to be taken serious? I have been in discussions with several christians and none have any issues with my picture or my blog name.

  19. Heather G says:

    Deep Strength – of course, off topic postings are a different matter entirely.

  20. infowarrior1 says:

    @jack
    ”As far as the teaching of scriptural truths, I have no issue with learning about this from a woman.”

    On an equal playing field in the marketplace of ideas maybe. But never ever involving authority over men as per the scriptures.

  21. infowarrior1 says:

    @Heather G
    ”If you’re going to be talking ABOUT women, then it would seem particularly unfair and self-serving to silence any women who don’t agree with you.”

    You go your own blogs to do that if the blog is a male space.

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