Thoughts on a clear vision for authentic manhood

This post comes from Authentic Manhood blog. I’ve read through a bunch of their blog posts, and they seem good so far. I can’t really tell as most of their material is in products though.

Here is the relevant part I want to discuss though:

My perception of what it meant to be a Christian man had been skewed by the way Jesus was typically presented in my church experience. David Murrow says in his book Why Men Hate Going To Church, “our very definition of what it means to be a ‘good Christian’ skews female.” He illustrates and supports this position with a quiz. Here it is:

Examine these two sets of values and choose the set that you think characterizes the values of Jesus Christ and His true disciples:

  • Set “A”
  • Competence
  • Power
  • Accomplishment
  • Efficiency
  • Skills
  • Proving Oneself
  • Goal Orientation
  • Competition
  • Results
  • Self-Sufficiency
  • Success
  • Achievement
  • Set “B”
  • Relationships
  • Communication
  • Love
  • Sharing
  • Personal Expression
  • Support
  • Community
  • Helping
  • Feelings
  • Loving Cooperation
  • Relating
  • Beauty

Murrow says that he has administered this quiz to thousands of people: men, women, Christians, and non-Christians. More than 90% of the time, people choose Set “B” as the best representation of Jesus Christ and His values.

Then, he reveals the origin of the two lists. These two value sets were plucked from the pages of the best-selling book, Men are from Mars, Women Are From Venus by Dr. John Gray. In Chapter 1 he identifies Set “A” as the values of Mars, whereas Set “B” describes the values of Venus. In other words, Set “A” represents the values common among men while Set “B” represents the values common among women.

Most of the people who took this little quiz think of Christ as having the values that come naturally to a woman! Granted, the values listed in Set “B” are some of the values that represented Jesus. The results of this quiz illustrate how confused today’s culture is about the real Jesus and the kind of masculinity he modeled. Most people’s vision of biblical manhood is blurred.


To maintain a clear vision of Authentic Manhood, it takes more than a brief encounter to discover what Jesus is really like. He is our model for manhood, and that demands our full attention. A close look at the life of Jesus reveals that real men reject passivity, accept responsibility, lead courageously, and invest eternally. They look good written in a journal, but integrating them into your life requires disciple, vulnerability, trust, and accountability over time.

Obviously, this is another clear piece of evidence that the Church has become increasingly feminized which I talked about in the 3 big elephants in the room. Most Christian men — and women for that matter — do not understand that they are living in a Christian environment that is feminized. However, the problem doesn’t just stop there. Since the church is feminized that implicitly — or sometimes explicitly — makes people think that feminine values are good and masculine values are bad. This is where the true heresies start coming out that women are good and men are bad. In some particular circles this has been warped even further to women are innately good and men are innately bad.

Unfortunately, the flaw I see from the site that otherwise has good material is that it still ignores discussing attraction in the context of manhood and marriage. But at least it seems some people recognize part(s) of the problem and are willing to work to correct the issue even if it is paid material. Alternatively, by becoming masculine you become attractive, so it is addressed somewhat peripherally.

Christian men should embrace their male traits: Competence, Power, Accomplishment, Efficiency, Skills, Proving Oneself, Goal Orientation, Competition, Results, Self-Sufficiency, Success, and Achievement. However, keep in mind that they need to be done in the context of grace and the gospel.

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12 Responses to Thoughts on a clear vision for authentic manhood

  1. Pingback: Thoughts on a clear vision for authentic manhood |

  2. Jonathan says:

    While there may be some good there
    be wary
    Matt Chandler is on it
    and he preaches that men should led by doing more housework so their wives can use their gifts ( aka work)….
    that is not manhood , not a biblical one
    more of Sandberg /feminist one…
    not to mention his church’s most famous female voice Jen Wilkin is basically a feminist…

  3. Jonathan says:


  4. @ Jonathan

    Thanks for the information. That’s good to know.

  5. Deep Strength

    The very Gospel has been feminized. What is the gospel? Well I would not want to contradict an angle of heaven.

    Then I saw another angel flying in the midst of heaven, having the everlasting gospel to preach to those who dwell on the earth — to every nation, tribe, tongue, and people — saying with a loud voice, “Fear God and give glory to Him, for the hour of His judgment has come; and worship Him who made heaven and earth, the sea and springs of water.” Revelation 14:6-7

    The Gospel is not essentially about you, it is about the Glory of Christ who judges evil and rescues His bride. The angel speaks in masculine warlike language. This is no wimpy Jesus, but the lion of Judah who brings vengeance on those who did not show fealty to their king. The Gospel is the city of God not the city of man / woman. Augustine writes: “Accordingly there are two cities formed by two loves; the earthly by the love of self, even to the contempt of God; the heavenly by the love of God even to the contempt of self. The former, in a word, glories in itself, the later in the Lord.”

    The modern gospel glorifies self and fixated on self. “Jesus loves and you and has a wonderful plan for your life” . The everlasting gospel as proclaimed by the angel for every person on earth is about the glory of God, His judgement of sin and worship directed to Him. Soli Deo Gloria! This is contrary to feminism that is seeking to “be as a god” and throw off the authority that God has placed over women. The modern/feminist gospel is a twisted self centered glorification of self and a casting off of the holiness of Christ for self expression and self law. Compare the psalms with the modern praise chorus, the former is by the hand of a warrior after God’s own heart, the later sentimental Harlequin romance put to music.

  6. Looking Glass says:

    Psalm 24 KJV

    1 The earth is the LORD’s, and everything in it.
    The world and all its people belong to him.
    2 For he laid the earth’s foundation on the seas
    and built it on the ocean depths.
    3 Who may climb the mountain of the LORD?
    Who may stand in his holy place?
    4 Only those whose hands and hearts are pure,
    who do not worship idols
    and never tell lies.
    5 They will receive the LORD’s blessing
    and have a right relationship with God their savior.
    6 Such people may seek you
    and worship in your presence, O God of Jacob.
    7 Open up, ancient gates!
    Open up, ancient doors,
    and let the King of glory enter.
    8 Who is the King of glory?
    The LORD, strong and mighty;
    the LORD, invincible in battle.
    9 Open up, ancient gates!
    Open up, ancient doors,
    and let the King of glory enter.
    10 Who is the King of glory?
    The LORD of Heaven’s Armies—
    he is the King of glory.

    Our God ain’t no wimp and is worthy of all honor & glory. A point he reinforces quite a lot.

  7. Looking Glass says:

    Err… that was the NLT version. I clicked the wrong link. My bad.

    1 {A Psalm of David.} The earth is the LORD’S, and the fulness thereof; the world, and they that dwell therein.
    2 For he hath founded it upon the seas, and established it upon the floods.
    3 Who shall ascend into the hill of the LORD? or who shall stand in his holy place?
    4 He that hath clean hands, and a pure heart; who hath not lifted up his soul unto vanity, nor sworn deceitfully.
    5 He shall receive the blessing from the LORD, and righteousness from the God of his salvation.
    6 This is the generation of them that seek him, that seek thy face, O Jacob. Selah.
    7 Lift up your heads, O ye gates; and be ye lift up, ye everlasting doors; and the King of glory shall come in.
    8 Who is this King of glory? The LORD strong and mighty, the LORD mighty in battle.
    9 Lift up your heads, O ye gates; even lift them up, ye everlasting doors; and the King of glory shall come in.
    10 Who is this King of glory? The LORD of hosts, he is the King of glory. Selah.

  8. Don Quixote says:

    I’ve often thought that many people understand Jesus as the man on the cross, or the baby in the manger. Couple these images with the impression that modern christianity [churchianity] leaves on any observer and its no wonder that most men think that Jesus [and His followers] have little or nothing to offer. But the truth is the exact opposite. So few can see through this paradox.

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