The Patriarchy Part 2

A couple months ago, I wrote on the Patriarchy. Jonadab-the-Rechabite makes an excellent comment over at Dalrock’s in response to a poster that Dalrock wrote on.

@ Wade
You have shown more courage than most and you deserve credit for that. I do not desire that you leave, but that you stay and be a Berean, to see if these things be true. As a shepherd you are held accountable for you teaching. If you are in error, I would think you would desire to repent. That takes humility and the illumination of the Holy Spirit. I pray that the Holy Spirit will work in you with many of the comments here including the following. I want to give you something to meditate on, it is in response to your statement:

“It is, as you rightly point out, my desire to show how patriarchy is not the pattern of the New Covenant Scriptures.”

I submit that patriarchy is not a polity, character or pattern that is of the created order, rather it is intrinsic to God and so transcends the created order. Much like truth is not a characteristic that is created or can rightly be used to judge God as if it is extrinsic to Him, God is truth and truth is a quality intrinsic to Him. We would not know what truth is, if God was not truth. In a similar way God is patriarchy. The economic trinity, (the relationships between the persons), is revealed as a patriarchy. Christ is the son of the Father, who does His Fathers will. The Father sends the Son to redeem the elect and blesses Him; “This is my Son with whom I am well pleased”. Christ is for all eternity past and future the Son of the Father. This is the rule of the Father which is literally patriarchy.

Beyond the economic Trinity is a patriarchy, redemption is also fashioned in scripture as a patriarchy. Christ the husband, elects, redeems and rules His bride the church. She is to worship, obey, fear, submit, serve, be subject to her husband, Christ. The rule of the husband as the head of the wife and the household is patriarchy.

Holiness is a quality that is intrinsic to God. We say that something is holy because it resembles godliness. Patriarchy is also holy. Christ is making His bride holy and a Christian husband sanctifies his wife (makes holy) with the washing and watering of the Word. Thus patriarchy is not a pattern of the New Testament covenant, nor dispensation nor administration et al. Patriarchy transcends human history and nature, it is the very nature of God. When Christians live in patriarchal families they reflect the very holiness of God and bear witness to His sovereign rule.

Indeed, Moose expressed similar sentiments in his post when discussing Patriarchy with the neoreaction.

This is the lie of feminism and modernity. The backdrop of our culture is that there is an undercurrent of rebellion against any male led endeavor. The evil acts of a few are touted as evidence that the structure is rotten. However, we know this to be false.

This leads to the conclusion that if the first thing you think of when you think of authority and/or headship is concern over how it can be abused rather how it can be used for good you’re already on the wrong track altogether.

Obfuscating questions such as “what if my [insert authority here] tells me to sin” are simply the result of a rotten mindset. This rottenness of the culture within each of us needs to be purged in order to operate with heart, mind, soul, and strength in alignment with God and the commands he gives to us regarding authority in the Scriptures.

Authority is always implicitly tied to the responsibility to love.

We see this reflected in the Father’s nature — ‘For God so loved the world that He sent His only son that whosoever shall believe in him will not perish but have eternal life’ — and as a command given to those in authority toward those subordinate. For examples, husbands to wives: ‘husbands love your wives as Christ loved the Church…’

If you want to address the point when discussing authority or Patriarchy with others, you need to find out why a person implicitly believes that authority is bad when it is good.

Case in point. Discussing the topic when they have a fundamentally different value system than you — authority = bad versus authority = good — will get you nowhere.

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14 Responses to The Patriarchy Part 2

  1. Pingback: The Patriarchy Part 2 –

  2. donalgraeme says:

    Discussing the topic when they have a fundamentally different value system than you — authority = bad versus authority = good — will get you nowhere.

    Exactly. The mindset is so different that no true outreach can be had. In a way, the other person is living on a different world from you.

  3. Pingback: The Term Patriarchy – BlendingAme

  4. Swanny River says:

    Here’s the confounding thing about our status quo brothers, they do believe in authority. One example of their belief in it is when they exercise it by shutting down the conversation with their strawmen arguments, or rotteness as DS nicely names it. It’s a way of telling RP guys to shut up, and that is an exercise of authority.
    And of course they believe in something so plain to see in the bible as authority, they couldn’t see themselves as solid leaders if they didn’t think of themselves as supporting authority. They certainly support the family courts and CPS stepping in, so there is another “good” authority they believe in, and another is cops, when they haul a man to jail anytime a women says boo.
    I think the problem is something along the lines of being educated, smart, caring, and yet also ignorant.
    They just can’t believe that there is a serious problem of rebellion. Maybe that is what you mean by living on a different world, it does seem like my church is a group of alien controlled pod people. They explain away all rebellious acts, and never ever ask if my wife or any wife is feral or contentious. It’s like when people look for an example of a bad person, they can only think of Hitler. Conservative Christians only seem to think Madonna is a wild horse, everyone else is deserving of their empathy, except for RP men.

  5. Swanny River says:

    Another thought, the white knight missionary in my small group would get really angry if you said he had a problem with authority, that’s partly because he’s so invested in servant leadership. So he likes authority, but he just doesn’t understand it. He comes from South Africa and has seen patriarchy misused, but he can’t imagine a Christian version. But he is a squish trying to fit in, so if RP became the culture, he’d be up with that too probably. My guess is that most of these leaders are just reflecting the church body’s overall rottenness and lack of health.

  6. Swanny River says:

    Anyhow, I really like the discussions here and at Dalrock. They are what I expect or want from a small group, but I’ve not seen in over 15 years of going to small groups. I’ve been going to them longer than that but some in the 90s were fruitful.

  7. Swanny River says:

    One more example of this topic working itself out in a mens small group. Someone from a Central American country mentioned his military Dad being a mizer and telling the Mom she could only have enough money for food each day. So I chimed in and said that I don’t like picking apart someone’s exercise of authority, but it’s more important than getting the execution of it right for every decision. The missionary just went off, telling me I’m extreme and that a woman staying home should be in control because she knows what’s needed. He just wasn’t capable of hearing me say I was backing the position. I’m writing so much because I’m angry, and that this tool gets the stamp of approval while I’m the extreme one. Yet he’s not capable of being a good listener, so he’s not going to be a good leader and he’s counseling two couples through marriage issues, but I have no one coming to me for marital advice.

  8. Looking Glass says:

    @Swanny River:

    “And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’” Mark 12:30 (ESV).

    The problem you’re dealing with is that the other Christians are functionally incapable of loving the Lord with their “mind”. They work from assumptions & emotions; never acceptance of the choice to follow.

    It’s also important that most people are Sheep. (The Lord is the one who calls us this, so he’s got His reasons.) How you approach them is, frankly, 80% of the battle. You’re never going to argue them out of their positions. So, be more Christ-like: never directly respond and always ask questions that put them to shame.

  9. “Discussing the topic when they have a fundamentally different value system than you — authority = bad versus authority = good — will get you nowhere.”

    If one is discussing any topic and the other person is contending that authority = bad,do not be deceived you are not speaking to a christian. Jesus speaks of authority often the following citations make the point that authority is central to Christian faith and life.

    John 17:1-2 Jesus spoke these words, lifted up His eyes to heaven, and said: “Father, the hour has come. Glorify Your Son, that Your Son also may glorify You, as You have given Him authority over all flesh, that He should give eternal life to as many as You have given Him….”

    Matthew 28:18 And Jesus came and spoke to them, saying, “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth.

    The apostles also underscore that authority is a tenant of the faith.

    Romans 13:1-2 Let every soul be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and the authorities that exist are appointed by God. Therefore whoever resists the authority resists the ordinance of God, and those who resist will bring judgment on themselves.

    Of course those who reject authority will also reject the authority of the scriptures. They are self-willed, autonomous and have thrown off reason. They are fools and the Proverbs give some guidelines on how to interact.

    Proverbs 26:4-5 Do not answer a fool according to his folly, Lest you also be like him. 5 Answer a fool according to his folly, Lest he be wise in his own eyes.

    We answer the fool with a higher authority to humble him so he is not wise in his own view of himself and lead him to repentance, but we avoid arguing according to his own perverse system so that we do not leave reason and authority for emotion or substitute lessor authority for God. The shame of it is that it is Christian leaders that are rejecting god’s authority, often with tortured reasoning and great doses of non-logic, at least when it comes to women and men.

    1 Timothy 2:11-15 Let a woman learn in silence with all submission. And I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man, but to be in silence. For Adam was formed first, then Eve. 14 And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived, fell into transgression. Nevertheless she will be saved in childbearing if they continue in faith, love, and holiness, with self-control.


    1 Corinthians 11:3-11 But I want you to know that the head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and the head of Christ is God. Every man praying or prophesying, having his head covered, dishonors his head. But every woman who prays or prophesies with her head uncovered dishonors her head, for that is one and the same as if her head were shaved. For if a woman is not covered, let her also be shorn. But if it is shameful for a woman to be shorn or shaved, let her be covered. For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, since he is the image and glory of God; but woman is the glory of man. For man is not from woman, but woman from man. Nor was man created for the woman, but woman for the man. For this reason the woman ought to have a symbol of authority on her head, because of the angels. Nevertheless, neither is man independent of woman, nor woman independent of man, in the Lord.

    It is stunning how authority of scripture is subverted for the authority of culture in the blink of an eye. I have come to accept that the real “Every-man’s battle” is not sexual desire as Stephen Arterburn has written, but it is worship of the woman. I could list a thousand examples: I saw a man over the weekend with a t-shirt that said “I’m in love with my awesome and hot wife”. That is worship! “Happy wife, happy life!” is the fear of the goddess, that is worship. “Listen to your wife”, is worship of the female and the source of Adam’s sin. Adam was an idolater who let the worship of the woman, overcome his worship of God. When the authority of God is supplanted for the glory, beauty and power be expressed we have come full circle to the fall of Lucifer. He did not want to live under a higher authority, even though he reflected the glory of God and was higher than the other angles, he rejected God’s authority and coveted worship for himself.

  10. Looking Glass says:


    It goes deeper. Worshiping Women is just the outcropping.

    It’s Responsibility. It is that you are responsible for your Actions. That is the deepest rejection of the Lord and his Authority. You choose & acted out your Sin. We are all due the wages of our work: damnation. That is what people are rejecting rather than being responsible for.

  11. @Looking Glass

    I’m not following what you are saying.

    Men are responsible for their idolatry of women, and guilty and deserving of death. Adam was cursed Gen 3:17 for heeding the voice of his wife and by it sinning against God. He both elevated Eve’s desire and bore responsibility. Likewise women are responsible for manipulating men and desiring to be as gods, worship and all.

  12. Looking Glass says:


    It’s simply a point about the deep Wisdom from the Lord. My ability to write is pretty limited at the moment, but I’ll take a stab at explaining further.

    “Worship of Women”, either in direct or practical terms, is definitely the core display and action-base that we see in most Modern societies. (And most societies in general, actually.) But that is the outward display of idolatry stemming from the inward rejection of the Lord’s place in our lives. For Men, they reject Responsibility and say, “let someone else make the decision”; for Women, they reject Responsibility and say, “let someone else take the consequences for my actions”. (This, one hopes, is the practical understand a Christian should gain from understanding Genesis 3.)

    This is also why the “rejection of Authority” is only specific to certain areas. (Classically, we understand that “Anti-authoritarian” activists are little Authoritarians themselves, they just want it to be *their* Authority.) Humans have little issue with Authority that serves their interests. But the Lord is rather clear that He is greater than all and has set what Righteousness is. (I’ve found it rather useful to call Righteousness “God’s Order”, as it forces people to confront what the words actually mean & imply for the life of a Christian.) That’s the rub of the entire situation. That’s what plays out in the deep parts of a person’s Soul and we see come out in the actions that they undertake to reject the Lord. This is why Christians will always be hated.

    “If the world hates you, know that it has hated me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love you as its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you.” John 15:18-19 (ESV)

    It it why they hate & reject all that is Good, but have little issue following that which is Evil. And with little question. That’s the split in their actions that, to an honest Christian, makes little sense. But, to the lost & damned, they are rejecting that which burns against their Soul, that they know is calling out to them. Thus they feed their rejection of the Lord and it spews forth from their life.

  13. Bee says:

    @Swanny River,

    ” The missionary just went off, telling me I’m extreme and that a woman staying home should be in control because she knows what’s needed.”

    It is a mistake to think and treat missionaries as more spiritually mature than others. Some are, some are not. I have a relative that spent years doing overseas missionary work with their family, neither spouse are spiritually mature.

  14. Pingback: Ideas for a treatise on Patriarchal marriage | Christianity and masculinity

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