Toxic masculinity—and the persistent idea that feelings are a “female thing”—has left a generation of straight men stranded on emotionally-stunted island, unable to forge intimate relationships with other men. It’s women who are paying the price.
You can appreciate the irony.
Feminism states men should be like women which means be “sensitive” and “express their emotions.” Yet when they start doing it, they’re labeled emotionally stunted (compared to women as the standard) and unable to forge intimate relationships with other men. Thus, women have to “bear the burden” of these emotionally stunted men.
Perhaps because these “other men” don’t want to hang around with men act like women.
This is yet another “problem” created by feminism, but attempted to be framed by blaming it on the patriarchy or toxic masculinity.
Some of the funnier excerpts:
Kelly’s story, though extreme, is a common example of modern American relationships. Women continue to bear the burden of men’s emotional lives, and why wouldn’t they? For generations, men have been taught to reject traits like gentleness and sensitivity, leaving them without the tools to deal with internalized anger and frustration. Meanwhile, the female savior trope continues to be romanticized on the silver screen (thanks Disney!), making it seem totally normal—even ideal—to find the man within the beast.
Unlike women, who are encouraged to foster deep platonic intimacy from a young age, American men—with their puffed up chests, fist bumps, and awkward side hugs—grow up believing that they should not only behave like stoic robots in front of other men, but that women are the only people they are allowed to turn to for emotional support—if anyone at all. And as modern relationships continue to put pressure on “the one” to be The Only One (where men cast their wives and girlfriends to play best friend, lover, career advisor, stylist, social secretary, emotional cheerleader, mom—to him, their future kids, or both—and eventually, on-call therapist minus the $200/hour fee), this form of emotional gold digging is not only detrimental to men, it’s exhausting an entire generation of women.
This is one of the hallmarks of the inverted roles in marriage.
Instead of the man as the head of the wife, the wife becomes the “head” of the man. But since there is no such thing as that, it becomes very similar to another relationship: a mother and her child.
One can only wonder why women become unhappy when they selectively choose to “mother” their man rather than respect him.
But unlike women in our mothers’ generation, Gen X’ers and millennials are starting to hold their partners accountable—or they’re simply leaving. Ruby Marez, a comedian in her early 30’s living in Los Angeles, got so fed up with functioning as an unpaid therapist that she gave her then-boyfriend of five years an ultimatum: Get a shrink or we’re done. “He had no excuse not to go since his job paid for it. But here I was, a struggling freelancer with no benefits, always finding a way to prioritize therapy and yoga.” He refused for two years, then finally agreed after multiple arguments—but there was a catch; only if she found the therapist and set up the appointments, which she did. He rarely went, says Marez, often blaming the therapist for scheduling conflicts. A little wiser, Marez broke up with her most recent boyfriend of two years after he said he didn’t need therapy, because he had her for that.
You get what you deserve is a pretty apt statement.
If you’re a woman and want to be the one in control in a relationship, you should expect to attract men who want you to be in control.
“Men are taught that feelings are a female thing,” muses Johnson, whose husband often complains about her wanting to “talk deep.” Though Johnson brags about how wonderful her husband is—grateful he doesn’t exhaust her with his neediness like a lot of her married friends—she does wish men were encouraged to examine and explore their emotions in a safe setting, like therapy, before they boil over. “I’m tired of having to replace another broken bedside table because he didn’t realize he needed to talk about his feelings,” she admits.
Men were never taught to not have feelings. This is just feminist projection that since men rarely emoted they think we’re taught not have feelings.
Men were taught to process emotions internally and to have good discipline and self control. This goes along with their nature.
It’s only after men aren’t taught to process their emotions internally and the lack of good male role models that you have men who can’t process their emotions correctly and lead to outbursts of anger and immaturity. Yet also somehow blamed on traditional masculinity.
There’s some other funny stuff in there that you can only shake your head at, but it’s pretty obvious that this is a problem of feminism’s making. They really want to complain about the men they created with their own philosophy while unloading the blame onto other things.