The Masculinist recently had a blog post on how to get out of the friend zone. My piece on it was 5 years ago. I think it’s time to go back over it in light of a bunch of the stuff we’ve been discussing on relational archetypes such as the Summary of evaluating relationships and marriage and plans of actions and the Bible and the female life path.
In the post on understanding the friend zone and escaping it, I detailed 4 main ways that you can “get out” of the friend zone.
- You were her friend, but she always liked you. She was waiting for you to ask her out.
- You were her friend, and you underwent some change to become a man while you didn’t see her for a while. When you meet her again you impress her.
- You were her friend, but you are developing into a man. Then one day her friend or some other random act of God makes her reconsider you and her eyes are proverbially opened.
- You were her friend, and she doesn’t know a certain side of you. An inadvertent crisis or significant display of social dominance or leadership shows her a side of you that she never saw before. She reconsiders you now as more attractive because of this masculine display.
All of these, aside from the first one where she already wants you to be the head/leader of a relationship, are “epiphanies” where she realized she’s attracted and wants to be in a relationship with you.
Let’s consider this in terms of the female life path.
Overall, virtually no one gets into a relationship with a woman other than headship or tingly respect. In other words, she must respect you and/or think that you are attractive to go on a date with you and want to be a in relationship. I can’t think of any relationships where this wasn’t the case, unless the woman in question was trying to use the man for something whether time, money, or other things.
In evaluating the friend zone specifically, we can understand that the vast majority of men in the friend zone are trying to garner a woman’s interest by doing things for her that they would do for someone dating them. In other words, they’re hanging out with her a lot, spending money to buy her gifts, food, or other things, complimenting her, and things such as these. I’ve gone over this before on some of my earlier (2013-2015) blog posts. In other words, the men are trying to back into a relationship with the women much like women try to do with attractive men by thinking sleeping with them will make them want to be in a relationship with them. It rarely works, and this is virtually feminism in action.
On a large scale, feminism seeks to re-distribute male resources (typically via the government) to women without any compensation. The majority of government spending on welfare, healthcare, and such goes to support poor women, single mothers, and women’s health.
Likewise, we see the same thing with friend zoned men who are attempting to get into a relationship with women. They are spending much of their time, energy, and resources (money or otherwise) on women who don’t want to date them and usually just let them do it. After all, who would deny a free meal ticket? Not most people on welfare especially the single mothers or the women getting free healthcare even if they don’t need it (e.g. free planned parenthood). I’m not saying that these social systems are bad. They’re great for people who are actually in desperate circumstances. I’m criticizing the ease and perhaps ubiquity of the ability to abuse the system much like women who have a ton of male orbiters.
To conclude, to the men who are friend zoned or are trying to get out of the friend zone just stop. You’re acting like a feminist. You’re spending your time, effort, money, and other resources on a woman who doesn’t want to be with you nor does she value you. Move on to a woman who is actually interested in you.