Still pretty busy, but still trying to get a post out or two.
Hearkening back to complementarians are worse than egalitarians, a majority of Dalrock’s recent posts all harp on this theme:
The general pattern is displayed in several relevant points, namely:
- If a husband is in sin (e.g. porn), it’s his fault for failing as a leader. If a wife is in sin (e.g. porn, romance novels), what is he doing to make her act this way?
- “Effort and feelings” (e.g. romance, emotions, feeling it) justifies marital sex. Oh, and it’s only the romance, emotions, and feelings of the wife. Not the husband.
- Women are responders. A husband’s leadership is justified by how his wife responds. Positively, he’s doing good. Negatively, he’s doing bad.
- Husbands are ‘brutes’ that need to be ‘civilized’ by their wives.
- Wives are innately more moral than their husbands.
- If a husband wants a divorce, he’s evil. If a wife wants a divorce, what’s the husband doing wrong?
The sum of all of this nonsense is: a wife can do no wrong. This is the essence of complementarian teaching, despite the lip service they give to the Bible.
We know that the Scripture preaches that all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. That we are responsible for our own personal actions. That even if others are treating us terrible or poorly that we should be kind and pray for them and should not sin. That even if we are married to non-Christians that we should act according to Christian principles despite if they sin.
It would be better to clarify the position that complementarians are worse than egalitarians. Egalitarians “overtly” claim equality, while advocating rule of the wife in marriage. Complementarians “overtly” claim the Biblical roles and responsibilities, while undermining the husband and advocating the rule of the wife in marriage.
The deception is far worse than we realize because they try to play their position off as truth, and cut down husbands much more than both egalitarians AND feminists. As Dalrock has noted, even secular magazines have been shocked over how films like the War Room have cut down husbands.
Complementarian teaching [in practice] = a wife can do no wrong.
The list of “complementarian” pastors who believe this is quite astonishing: Moore, Russell, Stanton, Piper, Mohler, etc. Pretty much everyone from Focus on the Family, Acts 29, and other so-called conservative Christian groups that say they adhere to the Scripture. Just look at all of their teachings on marriage.