Ephesians 5 is one of the most word play twisted passages I’ve ever seen from the Scriptures. All you need is a simple reading of what it says. Read what the words say.
Ephesians 5:22 Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. 24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.
Let’s go over it line by line.
Ephesians 5:22 Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
- Wives should submit to their husbands, as they do to God. This is the concept of authority.
- The nature of God is not sin. Therefore, if a husband is potentially in sin or potentially leading into sin, then she should respectfully and humbly tell him that it may be a sin. That’s the bare minimum of being a helpmeet and a Christian.
What happens with churchian pastors and other so-called teaching on this passage is that the deceivers attempt to give a wife a way to weasel out of her obligations. Your husband is potentially telling you to sin? Instead of telling wives to bring it up respectfully with a humble heart, it’s often “you don’t have to obey him” without any instruction the correct path. I think it should be pretty clear that when wives hear “you don’t have to obey him” without correct instruction, it stimulates the rebellious nature within them.
23 For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body.
Paul draws another analogy to the authority of the husband in the marriage relationship. Here’s the part about this that wives miss. The wives are one with their husbands as Christ is with the Church. Not a new revelation, as it mentioned many times in the Scripture, but is easy to forget.
If a wife approaches a potentially sinful situation with disrespect and a gloating attitude that is the same as hurting herself. The wife is injuring her own relationship with her husband. Since she and her husband are one, she needs to act like she is one. If you’re a Christian, any interaction even with your sin or his potential sin must be met with the fruits of the Spirit.
24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.
The qualifier, obviously, is as to the Lord. Likewise, in this verse the Church is subject to Christ: namely subject to moral authority not immoral. To borrow a line from Zippy: authorities, including the husband in a marriage relationship, have the capacity to create moral obligations. A wife not in obedience to a moral obligation is sinning.
This is as simple as saying: “If there’s potentially a sinful situation, I’ll let you know respectfully and humbly before I obey. If it turns out not to be a sinful situation, I’ll obey.”
How easy is that? But in churchianity there is hours and hours of discussion on what “submission” means and “when or when not to obey.” Are you kidding me? Can there be any doubt that we’re a rebellious people?
The real overarching key is that the fruits of the Spirit should be guiding any interaction, and that wives need to be proactive about being a godly helpmeet in their relationship. A wife whose heart is for her husband will look for ways to be respectful and obedient even if there is a potential sinful situation, while a wife who is rebellious will look for ways to disobey, take advantage, or rub it in his face.
Titus 2:4 so that they may [b]encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.
Titus 2 instructs older women on what to teach younger women, not what not to do for good measure. As I showed in the previous post on the problems with intelligent submission, teaching what not to do can often mislead wives into sinning and destroying their own relationships as evidenced from the comments. Those wives are disobeying their husbands and the Scriptures in 1 Peter 3.
Proverbs 14:1 The wise woman builds her house, But the foolish tears it down with her own hands.
Unfortunately, given our culture, any discussion on marriage and submission even in the Church often ends up on the latter. Both the pastor(s) and wives look for ways to be rebellious and to destroy their own relationships instead of building them up.
Wifely submission is easy. But rebellion runs deep, starting from the garden.