Aside from the sensationalist title, this is going to be an interesting post.
When I first wrote on fear, respect, honor, and truth (phobeo and timao), I only hinted at this reality. However, I want to be exceedingly clear on this point because it has the potential to change the mindset of many men in their interactions with women.
Ephesians 5:33 Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she [r]respects (phobeō) her husband.
G5399 — φοβέω — phobeō — fob-eh’-o
From G5401; to frighten, that is, (passively) to be alarmed; by analogy to be in awe of, that is, revere: – be (+ sore) afraid, fear (exceedingly), reverence.
Out of the 93 times that phobeō is used in the NT, this is the only time that it is used in reference to reverence or respect. The rest are in either fear of God, fear of the king, to be afraid of things, and the like.
Interestingly, it is also used in 1 Peter 3 which talks about how wives are supposed to act even if their husbands are unbelievers:
1 Peter 3:1 In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, 2 as they observe your chaste and [a]respectful behavior. 3 Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; 4 but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. 5 For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands; 6 just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right (agathopoieō) [b]without being frightened (phobeō) by any fear.
G15 — ἀγαθοποιέω — agathopoieō — ag-ath-op-oy-eh’-o
From G17; to be a well-doer (as a favor or a duty): – (when) do good (well).
The phrase for women stems from what is doing right. Or rather, agathopoieō is a conjunction of agathos and poieō. Agathos is a fruit of the Spirit for goodness, and poieō is a verb meaning to make or do. In other words, agathopoieō literally translates to mean one who does what is good. One who does what is good is like God because God is good. What is good in reference to the husbands is outlined in the prior verse which is to operate in submission to their husbands.
This is the dichotomy with which women operate:
- Women are to respect their husbands in that they submit to them. Women who submit to their husbands fear God and fear their husbands, and thus are paradoxically cleansed of their fear because they do what is good.
- Women who do not respect their husbands do not submit to them. Women who do not submit to their husbands do not fear God or their husbands, and thus have only judgment from God and their husbands for not do what is good.
This is a rational fear from a lack of submission and obedience to the headship and authority structures that God has implemented on the earth.
This is one reason why husbands are not to respect their wives. They are called to love them.
Respect in other forms
It is sufficiently clear that respect in terms of the husband-wife relationship in the Scriptures leads a man to never respect his wife but to love her instead. But what about with other people?
Here are some other verses where respect is used on occasion, but it does not mean the same thing.
Romans 2:11 For there is no respect of persons (prosōpolēpsia) with God.
Ephesians 6:9 9 And, ye masters, do the same things unto them, forbearing threatening: knowing that your Master also is in heaven; neither is there respect of persons (prosōpolēpsia) with him.
Colossians 3:25 25 But he that doeth wrong shall receive for the wrong which he hath done: and there is no respect of persons (prosōpolēpsia).
James 2:1 My brethren, have not the faith of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord of glory, with respect of persons (prosōpolēpsia).
James 2:9 But if ye have respect of persons (prosōpolēpsia), ye commit sin, and are convinced of the law as transgressors.
G4382 — προσωποληψία — prosōpolēpsia — pros-o-pol-ape-see’-ah
From G4381; partiality, that is, favoritism: – respect of persons.
God does not “respect persons” in terms of favoritism. Not respect in the sense of headship or authority.
Matthew 21:33 “Listen to another parable. There was a [i]landowner who planted a vineyard and put a wall around it and dug a wine press in it, and built a tower, and rented it out to [j]vine-growers and went on a journey. 34 When the [k]harvest time approached, he sent his slaves to the vine-growers to receive his produce. 35 The vine-growers took his slaves and beat one, and killed another, and stoned a third. 36 Again he sent another group of slaves larger than the first; and they did the same thing to them. 37 But afterward he sent his son to them, saying, ‘They will respect (entrepō) my son.’ 38 But when the vine-growers saw the son, they said among themselves, ‘This is the heir; come, let us kill him and seize his inheritance.’ 39 They took him, and threw him out of the vineyard and killed him.
Titus 2:8 sound in speech which is beyond reproach, so that the opponent will be put to shame (entrepō), having nothing bad to say about us.
Hebrews 12:9 Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence (entrepō): shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live?
G1788 — ἐντρέπω — entrepō — en-trep’-o
From G1722 and the base of G5157; to invert, that is, (figuratively and reflexively) in a good sense, to respect; or in a bad one, to confound: – regard, (give) reverence, shame.
I including the Hebrews passage given that the author of Hebrews is an excellent orator and uses words clearly and concisely. Entrepō is an interesting word in the sense that it’s primarily used to show a contrast in behavior. As you can see above, it is used in both terms of authority, between generations, and between peers. It’s not a unversal based respect in terms of the one that exists with headship and authority.
Why I don’t respect women
It’s common for many feminist women to demand respect. Such women demand respect because they are disabused with the notion that they want equality. As we all know, there is no such thing as equality.
Respect in the Biblical sense is never between peers. It is always between a headship or authority figure and the one submissive to the headship or authority figure. It is given specifically only by the one in submission.
We can see how this plays out in relationships. If a husband begins to respect his wife instead of love her, he starts to question his own decision making and he will start to cater to his wife. He will inevitably base his decisions off of her input and her feelings. Thus, the husband starts to live in respect, reverence, and fear of the wife. This creates an inverse to the relationship such that the woman becomes the husband and the man becomes the wife. The woman is throw into the position of loving her husband and the man is thrown into the position of respecting his wife. This is unScriptural and it makes the vast majority of couples extremely unhappy.
However, what we forget is that we see the same notion play out between a woman and her beta orbiters and white knights. The beta orbiters and white knights respect the woman they are after. Thus, they cater to her needs and feelings. They wonder why the woman will throw all they’ve done for her away in an instant when she meets a man who does not respect her. The answer by now should be quite obvious. Men should not respect women in general.
There two exceptions to this:
- Parents — we honor (timao) and respect (phobeo) our parents because they have been endowed by God with such authority. This is why we as men should respect our mothers.
- However, as we become of age our parents do not have authority over us anymore which means we do not endow them with respect, but we still honor them because they are our parents. This is difficult for most to understand. For those of age, it’s easy to disregard our parents advice often brutally because we are responsible for ourselves, but we still need to honor them as it is God’s command with a promise that does not expire.
- The only other exception is an institution in which you are submitted to. For example, if we were living in the time of the Victorian era with Queen Victoria then men would be required to submit and have respect for the queen because she has the authority appointed by God.
- Likewise, if you submit yourself to an intitution such as a university you are required to respect those appointed as teachers. This is why we are to respect the female teachers lest they hand down punishment upon you or expel you from the university.
As a rule, however, I do not respect women at all. Ever.
If I were to rephase this, what it means to respect or reverence another is to place them in authority or headship above yourself. This is the essence of what it means to pedelstalize a woman. You set herself up to have headship or authority over you — married or unmarried — and, thus you are setting up a false idol over yourself in place of God.
The authority I submit to is God, and He has outlined in His Scriptures which authority and headship structures to which I am to submit myself to and thus also respect, reverence, and fear.
Additionally, I respect men because the Bible submits:
1 Peter 5:5 You younger men, likewise, be subject to your elders; and all of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, for GOD IS OPPOSED TO THE PROUD, BUT GIVES GRACE TO THE HUMBLE.
In other words, submit to those who are elderly because of their wisdom in the faith. This is a specific kind of submission and respect that is given.
Otherwise, I generally am not a respector of other men. What I mean by this is that I acknowledge a common existance between myself and other men such that we face the same trials and hardships to become men in this life. However, I do not set them up with authority over myself unless I am an institution to which I submitted myself to learn. Outside of these institutions, I submit and therefore do not respect any man or woman regardless of their experience or expertise. Instead, I acknowledge their expertise and experience to learn from them.
Respect/reverence/fear in the Scriptures is directly associated with authority or headship. It should only be given in the instance of certain circumstances, and rarely if ever to women except in the case of mothers while you are still under your parents authority and in submission to earthly institutions.
Every time a woman demands respect from men or from me, especially Christian women, it is a good idea to remind yourself of this face. Women who say such things want to put themselves on a pedestal, and if you respect her you are complicit with setting her up as a false idol in your life and complicit in building up her pride which is sinful. You would be wise to avoid such sin.
In the context of courtship
This post is a long time in coming, but Free Northerner recently had an experience where this is highly applicable in regard to courtship.
Fourth, for those of you saying I should have not have submitted to the father, but instead taken the girl agains. t the father’s wishes, you are wrong. If she was the kind of girl who would disobey her father and abandon her family for a man she had known for only a month, she is not the kind of girl I would want to marry. The woman who will rebel against and abandon her father under the influence of passion is the same woman who will rebel against and leave her husband under the influence of passion. Once the father had denied the relationship, the only way we could have had a relationship is if she was the type of girl I would not want to have a relationship with.
FN is indeed correct to submit to the father’s decision. This goes along with the part of the Scriptures about submission to elders, especially with things in their jurisdiction such as family.
Prior to this, the relationship between the father and the suitor is that of peerage which some of the commentors mentioned and he agreed with. The husband is eventually going to be the one that the father passes his daughter off to, and thus it is important to operate with him on the level of a peer.
This is what it means to talk to someone man to man. However, it is also important to acknowledge that he is an elder over you and he is responsible for his daughter. Thus, it behooves you to speak man to man but clothed with humility.
Respect/reverence/fear is clearly delinated in the Scriptures by God to be given only in specific circumstnaces.
- Men should never respect women, except in two situations:
- If they are under the authority of their mothers, and
- If they are submitted to earthly institutions such as the government, school, or the like.
- Stay far away from women demanding respect, unless you want to enlighten them.
- Giving respect to a woman is akin to pedestaling them and setting them up as a false idol. Single men, boyfriends, and husbands beware. You are the wife in the relationship if you respect your wife.
- Men should respect their elders.
- Men shouldn’t respect other men or peers. They should acknowledge common hardship and trials especially in this life.
- Men should acknowledge expertise and experience from which to learn in a humble manner, but not submit themselves or pedestalize themselves to the person. This is where the classic logical fallacy “Appeal to Authority” comes from.
There are plenty of passages of Scripture that say to show honor to all. That is essentially the same thing as respect in modern English:
1Pe 2:17 Honor everyone. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the emperor.
Rom 12:10 Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor.
1 Timothy 5:3 Honor those who are truly widows.
I understand the point you’re trying to make, I’m just concerned that you’re overextending it beyond its bounds such that following your point makes obeying other clear priorities confusing.
I covered the difference in this article between honor (timao) and respect/reverence/fear (phobeo):
Honoring all as God’s creations for their talents, expertise, individuality, etc. is MUCH different than respecting/reverencing/fearing both in context of both men and women and heterosexual relationships.
Honor is something that is due to all. And reverence/respect/fear is only due to those in headship or authority positions.
I think the reason why we have this poor understanding between honor and respect is because English is muddled like that. That’s not how it is supposed to be.
Sure, and while that may be the case, why not just use the word fear rather than respect due to the connotation that respect tends to carry in English? I’m not trying to be trollish or anything like that. And I understand the difference in the Greek and even the distinction to be made in English, but it seems that in Christian parlance, fear already has been explained to typically mean “reverence,” so that average reader and hearer would already be primed to understand the distinction without needing to use controversial language in a purely dialectical (read: non-rhetorical moment). I understand the need for utilizing confusing terms for a point as in the parables, the prophets, etc. But when we’re breaking things down to the minutiae, I just wonder how helpful that is.
Maybe this answers my own question: Saying “why I don’t fear women” might also sound like something it isn’t.
That would be correct.
If you frame it in these terms it could be said that feminists have taken control of the narrative. They demand respect.
Is it the respect (or rather “honor”) that Christians should give all people that they are they demanding? Clearly not.
We know that they are demanding respect and also ‘equality.’ Thus, their demanded respect is striking toward headship and authority rather than honor.
In such cases, semantics are vastly important because they hinge upon the common defined terms by society. That’s why we cross reference them against the Greek here in order to root out the language which is used to control the frame of reference.
This post aims at taking down a word that is commonly defined as something it isn’t by feminism as the Scriptures clearly reveal God’s truth.
This is why I don’t respect women nor give any credence to respect demanded by women. It shows that they value themselves over God, consciously or unconsciously.
Good post; how do you believe this ties in to Paul’s admonition that each of us should esteem others as better than himself?
I’m aware of the utility of Greek. But, in general, even among very conservative men, if you told one of them, “I don’t respect your wife” the average understanding, unaffected by feminism, but more affected by general usage, would be a punch in the face.
The Scriptures do reveal God’s truth, but they don’t (as you know by using Greek) determine English word usage. I just typically try to avoid confusion when I can when talking about potentially life threatening matters.
So how do you define “love” in that Ephesians passage? How do you love someone without appreciating that person’s achievements and acknowledgments?
Karen, what do “achievements and acknowledgments” have anything to do with love? Last I check, nothing. Love, at least agape love such as was used in Ephesians 5, is selfless love. It is a loved based on giving without receiving anything back, or without merit.
Parents are to love their children, and do love their children, right? But what “achievements and acknowledgments” do children have that would justify love? Short answer: none.
Agape love, as directed from a husband to his wife, and from parents to their children, isn’t based on “achievements and acknowledgments”, but rather a selfless caring and concern for the person of the other.
I think most Christians need a good solid study of George Orwell’s 1984. DS is talking about more than a semantic issue. It’s the issue that there’s two different concepts included in “respect”, and we’ve, as Christians, taken them to be the same. It’s even worse with “love”, given how many versions there are in the Greek.
Still, this should be a great thread for Troll-bait. I can’t wait. 🙂
Good question. It also ties in with what Paul talks about in Romans 12 about no one ought to think of themselves more highly than they are.
I think this is best illustrated at looking at the reverse example. I can believe myself better than others but that doesn’t give me headship or authority over them. It just makes me prideful and arrogant. Likewise, esteeming others higher than me doesn’t set them in headship or authority over me, it just means I am humble enough to be able to serve them through love, honor them as God’s creations, and walk in humility.
Basically, these two concepts are not mutually exclusive. I can esteem my wife better than myself, but still walk in a headship role where she respects me and I love her.
What Donal said is correct. However, let me go one step further.
Tie this into the nature of Jesus did for us on the cross. What did humans do to deserve God sending His son to save us from our sins? Nothing.
~ For God so loved the world that He sent His only begotten son that whosoever should believe in Him shall have eternal life
~ For God shows His love for us in this: while we were yet sinners Christ died for us.
Love is not based on what we have achieved, acknowledged, or done. It is actions that direct others to Christ, even when we may not deserve it.
Yep, which is why you shouldn’t broach this topic in real life like I did in this post.
I would disagree that the average conservative man understands the Scriptures correctly though. For instance, most men still believe that they want their wife to LOVE them not respect this. This is what you typically see with most Christian men who enter the manosphere — almost all of them wanted women to LOVE them for who they are rather than respect them. They have been feminized to the point that they want love over respect.
When I saw the title of this post in my email, I busted out laughing, thinking of all the feminists that would be SO ticked off to read it… I can just imagine the steam shooting from their ears, lol. Sounds awful I know, but yeah…
Anyways, great post as usual DS!
I was thinking about this a little more, and if you were going to have a discussion like this person, I’d use “reverence”. Not perfect, but it’s an obscure enough of a word (where most will have to pause a second to understand what you’re talking about) to start the discussion on the ground you’re trying to cover. That, and most should understand the implication of the problem when you frame it in such a way.
@ Looking Glass
I’d go the “respect” instead of “reverence” route because it makes a better point, BUT you have to know your Scripture verses that clearly show that phobeo is not timao and timao is not phobeo and why that is the case.
Which also brings me to another point — the old saying that respect is earned is clearly false in the context of phobeo versus timao. Respect is never earned.
“if we were living in the time of the Victorian era with Queen Elizabeth”
I LOLd at that one. And I don’t LOL often.
You might want to fix that.
@ Wizard Prang
LOL, oops. Fixed.
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Am I right in understanding that what you are saying the Bible means by respect is one person’s acknowledgement of the authority another has over them? At least in the context of husband/wife, parent/child, and certain civil authorities over their members?
If yes, shouldn’t your post be titled Why Women and Men Shouldn’t Respect Each Other? As a wife, I respect my husband. As a woman, I don’t respect you because you don’t hold that authority.
Is that correct?
@ Mrs C
That would be correct. Biblically speaking, respect is only due those in authority or headship in a relationship.
My audience is not women, so that’s why I didn’t make that the title.
Single women and single men looking to get married would be wise to understand that headship, respect, submission, and the like is a process in the dating/courtship and engagement process that needs to happen gradually as they progress toward marriage.
I’ve rarely seen a marriage work successfully where the man before was not aligning his interests in terms of headship and the woman was not aligning her interests in terms of respect and submission throughout that process. It’s difficult to do an instant 180 once the vows are said though not impossible. Likewise, most Christian transformations happen gradually as we become more like Christ, though there are some incredible testimonies of 180s.
I see your point in trying to make clear what respect means in the Bible and I completely agree. However, in the great scope of human history, language is only as good as the context it’s taken in. Each place and time down through the ages has given words their meaning.
In our culture today, to respect someone generally means to honor their basic dignity as another human person or, better, if you are a Christian, to acknowledge their dignity as created in God’s image.
So while I think that for the importance of correct Biblical interpretation of scriptures, it’s good to study, as you did, to come to the meaning of the language of that time period, we need to acknowledge the time and place in which we find ourselves in human history, and explain things in language that is commonly used today lest we be misunderstood.
That’s just my feminine and very wordy way of saying what the other guy said above about “you could get your lights punched out.” LOL
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@ Mrs C
I wrote this post up about this semantical issue:
Your point on semantics is good: they are not “mere” semantics.
Seems to me the modern parlance has exactly switched the meanings of “honor” and “respect.” That is, I generally think of “respect” as the way I ought to treat all people: the way I want to be treated. This is probably better termed “common courtesy,” and is more akin to the biblical concept of how I ought to honor all people (or, at least, a watery version of that). And on the contrary, when I think of how to “honor” a person, I think of esteeming them, elevating them, deferring to them if not being outright in subjection to them (as I might defer to someone’s experience without considering them my leader). And this, of course, is much closer to how we ought to respect those in authority (especially husbands!).
Yep, that certainly seems to be the case.
The main issue with the reversal is that most Scriptures say ‘respect’ (phobeo) the husband and in 1 Peter 3 sometimes also says respect (timao) the wife as co-heirs.
So there are even cases where the Scriptural meaning is obscured because of use of the same word for different meanings. We really need a clear understanding of the semantics so we know how to treat people correctly as God wants them to be treated in relationships.
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I have always found it interesting with regard to the “fear” aspect of a wife’s relationship towards her husband. I would like to propose something to the guys there:
What do you think of a situation in which the wife does have reverence and respect and plenty of fear towards her husband? She fears him in the truest sense of the word, and because she fears him, she does what he tells her to do. She cannot shake the fear she has of him, and does not particularly like him deep in her heart (numerous reasons). Realizing intellectually that respecting her husband and doing what he wants her to do has nothing to do with whether or not she likes him, she resolves to carry out the Biblical injunction. After trying to reconcile her genuine fear and the fact that she doesn’t like him, she proceeds to always have respect for his position of authority, strives in every way to do what he wants her to do and in the manner in which he wishes her to do it. She tries not to bother him, partly because she doesn’t like him due to the fear she has of him. Yet he continues to complain that she doesn’t respect him. She finally tells him that she is afraid of him, doesn’t feel comfortable around him and he makes her nervous. She tells him that she knows she is to respect him and she is striving to do just that by doing the things he wants her to do. She says she can’t help the fact that she doesn’t like him, the history between them is such that she finds herself nervous whenever he is around and she can’t help that. Then he blows up because he accuses her of disrespect, when in fact she is being honest and up-front. This makes her fear him all the more. And so the cycle continues, round and round.
So what is your proposal? I would like to hear a male perspective on this.
@ Mom in the shoe
This is an easy question to answer. Break down what is said:
Honesty is good, but full disclosure honesty is in very bad taste. For example, Jesus could’ve come to the earth and said… “boom, all of you are sinners and going to hell if you don’t repent and believe in me,” But He didn’t because it’s obvious that He doesn’t need to say that and can do it in a more tactful and tasteful manner.
The dysfunction here is that in communication it is almost always the best thing to seek to understand the other person before telling them how you feel about things.
In this specific scenario, if a wife tells her husband she can’t help that she doesn’t like him then what do you expect? Most humans when someone says that they don’t like them won’t have a positive response even Christians.
Why is the husband getting aggravated? Why doesn’t she ask him about it? If he is closed off the wife can come at it from the angle that she wants to help fulfill his needs as his helpmeet. There’s lots of angles that a wife can take in a situation where she is seeking to understand the needs of her husband.
After someone feels understood that’s when they become more open to other’s needs. That’s when the time is to talk about your feelings but not in an accusatory way like the above.
Secondly, the wife has nothing to fear in both God (1 John 4) and of her husband if she does right (1 Peter 3). If she is fearing then she is walking in the flesh and not the Spirit.
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Yup I can appreciate the biblical discussion. Caveat: I’m not trolling here – I’m relating some real-life incidents. The assumption that is carried above is that you are dealing with reasonable people who will respond in reasonable ways. That is not always the case.
So tell me where in the bible does it specifically talk about fear and abuse of power ? What about the wives with drunk husbands who come home and beat then for some little thing ? Or the boss who says “I don’t like the colour of your tie – you’re fired”. Historically, most churches bury their heads in the sand and pretend the issue doesn’t exist because they don’t know how to handle it. Or what about a wife with undiagnosed mental health problems (perhaps induced by a brain tumour) who can change from calm to violent in a blink, who bashes an unsuspecting husband with the edge of a solid door as he walks through it and then follows up hitting him about the head with heavy objects. There are lots of other examples.The Fruits of the Spirit are not present in these circumstances. What should the husbands response be if the woman is not responsible for her actions ? Should he restrain her ? If so how ? How can a wife restrain or stob ahusband abusing her ?
This is abuse. If there’s physical abuse bringing fear of harm, what’s the biblical perspective.? If there’s no means of physical escape, what should that person do ? What if the abuse is careful and doesn’t leave marks or the person cannot get to the police before the marks have healed ?
This is only ohysical abuse. I have not discussed emotional or financial abuse. I have my own
perspective here, but I’m curious about your response.
Again – I am not trolling. I already have an opinion but am not currently sharing it (I will later) I. don’t believe the “if she is fearing then she is walking in the flesh” comment is helpful in supplying a Godly response that helps the woman. Nor is a “it was meant to happen” response.
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As a Christian woman, my idea of respect is a little different and I try to treat everyone with respect. That conveys the idea that everyone has dignity and I treat them in a way that recognizes their worth as a human being created in the image of God and not as someone who is beneath, or of lesser value, than me. I think women are paradoxical creatures, or at least feminine Christian women are. If we feel the man views us as beneath him, and as only existing to fulfill his needs, that’s when we tend to dig in our heels and try to dominate. If a woman feels that a man values her as someone equal in terms of dignity and worth, as an autonomous creature with her own needs, desires, and interests and not just an extension of his own personality, then she is much more likely to feel safe to submit to such a man. In other words, if he rules with a tight reign, she may follow him out of fear and not out of respect and admiration. If he is secure in his masculinity, he won’t feel the need to hold the reigns so tightly, imho.
Excellent post. The root of the damnation of God’s people is that women demand respect and men give it to them [Gen 3:16+17 God reprimanded Adam for respecting Eve.]
One suggested correction, in your conclusion: men should not submit to or obey women, ever, even in so-called government; can a woman ever be gov’t to a man?. I suggest that God has abandon His people at that point. All this said, we are in a conundrum: today we have a lot of women telling men what to do. I am fortunate that I have never had to submit to a so-called woman supervisor or judge or policeman [I’m 62] but my son’s are under this direct curse. I have pondered if I will resist arrest by a female policeman and simply walk to her male counterpart to be cuffed. But we must start making the point; we must start speaking the language of God.
Thanks for your blog. The Lord’s continued blessings as he further enlightens you, and men that will seek righteousness, to His Word — the very Being of Jesus, the Christ.
Jesus said to love one another and be kind to one another. If you don’t show respect toward a woman or anyone else, this is being unkind. I feel this author is very confused on the fact that being kind, as our Lord Jesus asked, does include a level of respect.
When someone doesn’t show me respect, I feel hurt, belittled, treated as less than they are, they are acting in a condescending way. Being kind, lifting one another up, is what Jesus meant. A strong person lifts others up, a weak person puts others down. Although, the Golden Rule may not come from the Bible, it does reflect the way we should treat one another; treat others the way you want to be treated, and this is called respect for others.
Respect come from an authority-submissive relationship. This includes God – man, husband – wife, parents – children.
Love is meant for God, your neighbor, and yourself.
Don’t confuse the two.
You’re a psychotic narcissistic individual. Paul would call you a lover of yourself. You have more in line with the mindset of an Islamic husband. You left something out of your insane twisting of Scripture to fit *your* FALSE teaching. In order to love someone, respect builds vulnerability to create a long lasting marriage. To love with no respect is NO relationship at all. It’s one-sided & narcissistic of which you prove your prideful/vain forked tongue of lies. You, Biblical Gender Roles (Larry Solomon), Michael & Debi Pearl, & Ken & Lori Alexander are ALL blind & teach toxic narcissistic hate. May God have mercy on you considering the FALSE lies you teach that you really believe is “God’s Word”. May God give you eyes to see & ears to hear!
Don’t you just love obvious influence bots? It’s fascinating to be able to pick them out in the first sentence, these days. I’d point out that bearing false witness is a pretty serious issue for a Christian, but what’s a bit of code got to do with Christ?
@ Looking Glass
This one seems more real since they’re mentioned a lot of different blogs.
Funny thing is they say that there is “twisting of Scriptures” but can never seem to actually use the Scripture of their own to point out why it’s wrong.
It’s pretty obvious the reason why: they’re wrong and can’t actually use Scripture to justify their position.
You said you shouldn’t cater to her will. Jesus Christ wasn’t selfish. He came to Earth to serve not to be served. If a woman is to accept leadership from a man, it should be only from a righteous man. The role of a leader isn’t self serving or to get a slave. CEOs and alpha chimps have more empathy than most males. Leadership is about service and knowing who you serve and having empathy. Being a leader of a woman without considering her opinions or feelings is unrighteous dominion and the opposite of the leadership of Jesus Christ.
Correct, a husband should not cater to his wife’s *will*, but he should consider his wife’s opinions and feelings. I can see how you may get confused.
In Genesis 3, Adam caters to his wife Eve and eats the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil with her instead of rejecting it and telling her not to. This is one of the original temptations that husbands still go through today.
Husbands either abdicate their role as head or get lazy and the wife takes up the reigns of the head in marriage and husbands go along with it.
1 Peter 3 speaks to husbands being understanding and honoring their wives. This does mean that they should try to consider her opinions and feelings, but they should make decisions on what is best according to the Scriptures and family. The model for marriage is Christ and the Church (Eph 5), and Jesus did not let the Church/disciples get in the way of His mission on earth even when the disciples thought otherwise or didn’t understand.
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